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    無法到達的幸福

    有些幸福始終無法到達,有些人,始終無法走到最后,天下沒有不散的宴席,終有曲終人散的那天。我想象你也會生活的很好,在我離開之后。因為我之于你,只是一個普通朋友而已。

    知道是上輩子欠的債太多,還是這輩子遇人不淑,遇到的都是無法接受我真心的主。不知道是不是自己癡情的錯,還是這世界變更太快,我追不上變更的步伐。我總是要眼睜睜的忍受眼前的一切。

    花了很多年的光陰,全身心投入事業,在差不多走出第一段感情帶來的陰影的時候,遇見了你,你不經意的贊助,讓我的心坎產生了某種異樣的感到,我深知自己無法相配,只能默默的對你好。等到身邊的人都說我們很相配,我事業也小又所成的時候,我開始產生某種妄想,認為也許我們能走在一起呢。于是,我很努力的改變自己,自己的性格,我還是持續努力的工作,我愿望你心坎里能尊重我的感情和減輕你的累贅。我容忍你的一切,你的不思上進,你的懷舊,你跟其他的女人的緋聞,我總是信任,總有一天你能感到到我的付出和努力。

    我信任,你是知道的,但是你從來不做回應。直到2009年,我看到某些東西,我明白,我的幸福已經要慢慢遠離了。有些感情,是身不由己,你之余我,她之余你,都是。我一直在思考,日久生情和一見鐘情那種最終會修成正果,我依然期望你回頭。我高估了自己和你我的感情,你稱之僅僅為好感的感情,你跟她正式在一起了,不久之后我知道你們同居了。此時,我明白,我們這輩子也不能回頭了。生活還在持續,我無力改變,世界上的任何事情都能一個人完成,但是愛情除外,我愛你,我也愿望與你無關。我開始冷落你,盡量減少與你的接觸,愿望這樣我可以不再對你心存妄想和眷念。在一次次的冷戰后,每次都以我心軟告終,其實這對我真的不是件很簡單的事情。我總是想,等我離開了,一切都會過去的,我心坎所受的苦楚和煎熬也許大大的越過了自己的想象,我現在都不知道那兩年我是怎么過的。

    我想著我們應該就這樣了,也許你永遠都不知道你在我的心里有多么的首要,我沒計劃奉告你喝其它的人。但是,在一次巧合,你盡然說你想念我,我真的無法分手這是真話還是謊言,前提是她不在。人在感情面前會顯得很不理智,我輕易的接受你的要求,其實我想奉告你,我一點也不后悔,盡管你一再強調我們沒有結果。其實我不在意結果,但是你的不知道,讓我心灰意冷,我知道你的心坎還是向著她。你的懦弱讓我鄙視,但是我有什么資格去責怪你呢,原因就在于你不夠愛我,對不對?

    后來,,你說我們可以回到以前,多久的以前,是不認識的以前還是這些事發生的以前,我們真的就像以前一樣了。但是我的心坎產生了實質的變更,我無數次提醒自己,你是有主的,我們一起時我偷了屬于別人的幸福,我知道我該忘懷,但是有很多事,并不是說忘懷就能忘懷。如果不能忘懷,我想就不要忘懷了,只要不陰礙正常的生活,記著也無妨。

    我已經不想再去想我該怎么面對你,我怎么做才對的問題了,我想光陰能改變一切!

    說很微信號(谷普下載):duanwenxuewang,鼠標移到這里,一鍵關注。

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